| (no subject) |
[Aug. 31st, 2006|11:22 pm] |
A random joke that amused me greatly.
A poodle was on a safari hunting expedition with his master and got separated from the group. Africa is a big place with lions and cheetahs that would like a poodle for a snack. Case in point, the poodle finds the bones of a dead cheetah as he is walking around lost.
That's not the worst of it, though. The poodle notices that there is another cheetah sneaking up behind him. Poodles are very smart dogs, fortunately, and he has a plan.
As the cheetah is sneaking up behind the poodle, the poodle says "My that cheetah tasted GREAT! I wonder where I can find another one!"
Highly disturbed, the cheetah runs away. However, a party pooping monkey had been watching from a tree. "I know you didn't eat a cheetah! I'm going to go tell and you're going to be cat food."
Off the monkey went.
Eventually, he found the cheetah and told him that the poodle had tricked him! The cheetah said, "Hop on my back. I'm going to go back and teach that poodle a lesson"
Off the cheetah ran with the monkey on his back, ready for revenge. He ran right back to where they'd seen the poodle before. Sure enough, the poodle was still sitting there by the cheetah bones with his back turned. He couldn't see the cheetah approaching, but instead sat still talking to himself.
"Now where's that damn monkey? I sent him out to find me another cheetah an HOUR ago!" |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Aug. 12th, 2006|12:46 pm] |
Howdy to all y'all from down in the Lone Star state. The McCrory's be vacationing. Heck, the McCrory's have been vacationing. They're going to continue vacationing up to Kansas, Oklahoma City, and then Nebraska, but I won't be with the rest of the clan for that. Matt and I are going to be flying home on Sunday. Personally, I prefer to fly with only carry-on luggage. This allows me to avoid the hassles of checking luggage and then wondering if the luggage handlers can find their way through the subterranean maze that must be present underneath the baggage carousel. The existence of such a maze has to be the reason that luggage still ends up on different planes or takes an hour and a half to find it's way into your hands after your flight. Once airport workers fully evolve into molemen things will go much smoother, but we're not quite there yet.
The reason for that rant? Terrorists have now made it illegal to play my gameboy on the flight or even keep my cellphone in my backpack. My carry-on is no longer carriable. This is decidedly inconvenient.
Once I'm back in VA and not sharing a computer with 8 people I'll do a write up about my trip and my new job.
Peace, chicken, and grease. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jul. 18th, 2006|01:59 pm] |
It can be really hard to remember to post to this sucker sometimes. I'm honestly just really enjoying being a bum for the summer. Writing reminds me too much of work or school! I still have anecdotes I need to write out, and I've been up to some fun stuff lately, but the motivation is fleeting. I'm just writing this to act as a quick filler for myself, so that it's not like I abandoned this project completely. In fact, I want to start writing a lot more often once the school year starts. Partly to keep track of my classes progress and what not. It's easier to see a student's process if I notice that over the course of a month I start saying nicer things about them even if they're still driving me up the walls in class. That will be friends only, though. JFK may be more likely to rise from the dead with cybernetic implants to create a great jelly donut than a student is to find my LJ, but it's better to be safe than sorry.
Anyway, that's my ten cents. If anyone has any cool memes, surveys, or just wants me to write about a funny moment I may do it.
Peace out girl scouts. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jul. 3rd, 2006|01:57 pm] |
The moron boys have $2000 in fireworks.
TWO-THOUSAND
Bottle rockets, mortars, and firecrackers, oh my
Maybe I should've bought some with them, but it's kind of hard for them not to share devices exploding in the air. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jul. 2nd, 2006|02:16 pm] |
An ode to tea.
I just got done brewing up a pot of English Afternoon tea. It's a new leaf for me, but it's worth a shot. Milk is recommended for bringing out the full flavor. I'm not sure what flavor they're talking about, but it's probably not the flavor of the great big flakey chunks of milk floating on top of my tea. Cheers anyone?
Always check the milk after you're gone for a week.
Thank you.
*snap snap*
Heh. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jun. 25th, 2006|01:15 pm] |
NOTE: I started this Saturday morning, but never had time to finish. I'm sitting around waiting for my family to be ready to leave for the beach and figured I'd post what I'd done so far.
A writing exercise really doesn't get you anywhere if you DON'T WRITE! Bad Mike! No banana! (The potassium in bananas is scientifically proven to make you happy)
Properly chastised, I will now relate the events of last Saturday and those that led up to it before the haze of memory obscures all the details.
( Read more... ) |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jun. 16th, 2006|11:22 pm] |
Ya know...I'm really going to miss working at the Burke ALC. Today was the last day for the students and it was a real rollercoaster ride. However, all of the staff went out to eat afterwards to celebrate our survival. Maybe it was a combination of realizing that working at Burke is as close as I've come to a dream job, further realizing that I won't be working there next year, and not eating because I'm cutting a couple of pounds for the tournament tomorrow...I just got a little down during the lunch. I'm gonna miss that place, but it's time to move on.
Other than that it's been a great day. I danced with the staff to the "Celebrate Good Times Come on!" song (whatever it's called), delivered food to the homeless, (hopefully) supplied my brother with good directions to the prom, and I'm a bit nervous/excited about the tournament tomorrow. I'm hoping that I don't go down there and realize I forgot something major. It's not super-close and everyone is pretty busy, so I'm 99.9% likely to be making a solo trip. Even Christine and Cooley are going to be up in Burke the one time I run down to Fredricksburg. Other than that, I'd like to win at least one match and preferably as many as I lose.
Looking back at my earlier and funnier writings, I'm going to have to start writing some anecdotes when I'm fully done with work next Tuesday. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jun. 11th, 2006|12:09 am] |
I'd write more, but life has been quite busy. This is the final week of work for my students! WOOOOO!!! I'll still have a pair of teacher workdays the week after, but it's all gravy.
In other news, I ache all over. I decided I've been lazy about lifting weights lately and I should start doing squats. Enter rubber legs. Then there was two hours of BJJ today and tennis doubles afterwards. John and I headed to Giant afterwards so he could get sandwich ingredients and I could rent Harry Potter for school (more on that fun upcoming story later).
In a BJJ belt ceremony it is apparently commonplace to get your bunda smacked by everyone else's belt at the ceremony. I saw a man who won't be sitting for a week thanks to 70 helpful BJJ students.
I'm, also thinking about participating in this: http://combatsportschallenge.com/images/CSC15_old.jpg
Good thing I get to list myself as a novice... |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jun. 6th, 2006|11:15 pm] |
xWhoDrivingx (10:43:48 PM): http://www.streetracersonline.com/forum/index.php?showtopic=9745&st=0&p=186636&
Auto response from MikalloMcc (10:43:48 PM): BJJ with a Gi is no longer like wrestling....it's like asthma. Damn those things overheat you!
MikalloMcc (10:49:49 PM): HAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
MikalloMcc (10:49:53 PM): Phase inducers!?!?!?!
MikalloMcc (10:50:02 PM): warp coils?!?!?!
xWhoDrivingx (10:50:05 PM): i have so much fun there it should be outlawed
MikalloMcc (10:50:29 PM): The first sentence had me going "Wtf? How much does he......there's no way he's serious"
MikalloMcc (10:50:35 PM): hahahhahahhaa
MikalloMcc (10:51:14 PM): John....while you are an asshole, there are days that you can still be my hero
xWhoDrivingx (10:51:30 PM): thank you |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jun. 2nd, 2006|08:11 pm] |
Today was a loooong day. At school, we took the kids to a Civil War medicine museum and an Antietam field hospital.
In short: One of the students passed out and hit his head 20 feet from me, we saw a haunted house, learned all about amputation and we got stuck in rush hour beltway traffic.
Actually, it wasn't a bad time at all, but after driving a student home when his mom was a no-show and a broke down truck on Burke Lake Road, I didn't get home until after 6:30. Mike = Tired with a capital T.
I've got to start thinking about where I want to work next year, as well. Lake Braddock and W.T. Woodson have both asked me to take a contract with them. They both expect an answer relatively quickly too. It's funny, because I went to both of those interviews as practice and never really thought about working there. Now, they contacted me at the earliest allowed time and I'm considering it.
Much pondering needs to be done.
For now, I'm off to play Warhammer. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[May. 21st, 2006|10:53 am] |
|
I saw a man crowd surf in a wheel chair. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[May. 19th, 2006|03:24 pm] |
Today was one of those days at work where you feel like you really accomplished something. In my case (and hopefully my students), it was a memory.
I was outside with five of the kids and we were supposed to be shoveling/transferring mulch. The only problem was none of the kids sans one wanted to get any dirt on their hands. Who'd have thought the little hooligans are all neat-nicks? Anyway, after chasing some geese and smearing dirt on my face warpaint style we all had a good time AND did our work. It was great seeing everyone have a good time. They were all acting more like kids their age than "hardcore" or "thugs."
Hopefully, all the stinkers understand that none of us are in it for the money (personally, I get paid in tiddleywinks and broken pencils) and that we actually care what happens in the end.
Today's meeting was a lot of fun, too. I think that Ms. Howell really enjoyed the idea of a staff paintball bonding exercise. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[May. 12th, 2006|10:31 pm] |
I should be heading to bed, but here I am farting around on AIM and LJ. Tomorrow morning I have to take the Virginia Reading Assessment at 7:30 AM at Mt. Vernon High School. It's at least half an hour away and I probably should *shudder* Mapquest the directions. I'm not too worried though! The test was a new requirement for aspiring special education teachers as of January 1, 2006. There is no minimum score up until June 15! I could walk in, spit on the test, sign my name and still be licensed. It's HIGHLY tempting to do so as well. Any other ideas that would help make a story of a lifetime are welcome!
Today has been a pretty good day. It's going to sound even better when I gloss over all the slow parts!
1) At work it was Teacher Appreciation Day. Vicki and I managed to find whipped cream and strawberries in the cafeteria for all the teachers. In return, I was surprised with a class photo signed by all the kids. All of the staff received a photo and a plant that's going into the class garden. I just hope I'm not supposed to sing to it! I don't know the first thing about gardening and I'm pretty sure that my singing would stunt the population growth of a pair of chinese rabbits hopped up on viagra. Also, I got some candle holders. I labeled them "His and Her" shot glasses much to the amusement of Mandy
2) After school, I met up with Bill. He had his wisdom teeth pulled out today. However, he proved to be a disappointment. There were no drunken anesthetic antics. He was behaved. This goes against every experience I've ever had with him and alcohol. More on that one later.
3) I went out to dinner with some of the family and Jama. Free food = great. Dad sported me for a ride on the hood of his car as well. Mom was not amused.
4) Bill's girlfriend, Jess, confessed that Jama tried to make her take her pants of in the kitchen. I do not lie. (It sounds naughty, but in reality Jama just wanted to see her insulin pump and what it looked like)
5) I popped over to Cooley's for a bit. I retrieved my camera (oh, how I missed it) and was subjected to some music videos. The NSYNC of India reminded me of Captain Planet and the Planeteers with Turbans. They also had potbellies, beards, and threw CG fireballs. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[May. 10th, 2006|09:27 pm] |
|
I haven't updated for a bit. However, I just got back from frisbee golf and now I'm lazy so here's a news snippet. I think that they're having trouble thinking up good news lately. http://www.cnn.com/2006/EDUCATION/05/10/perpetual.student.ap/index.html I love the last line. "For the sanity of the rest of the campus, we want him to get out of here." If only the rest of us, could have similar things posted about us by CNN. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[May. 3rd, 2006|10:23 pm] |
Isn't it funny how most people can crap out any sort of writing that is nonessential? Take this LJ post and compare it to the take home final that's due tomorrow. My bad! I can't complain about being bored, because everything becomes more fun when you're supposed to be working! I'm having a blast!
Anyway, the real reason for this post is to relate a funny mom story. Monday, while I was at work, my mom called me.
"Mike? My rear window exploded at a stop light. Can they do that?"
According to my mom, she was sitting at a red light, minding her own business, when the back window on the van decided to hop on the back seat and take a breather. There was no wreck. No warning. Just....*CRASH!!!!* I meant to take a picture of the broken window, but my dad is too quick acting. I think he was ecstatic over the idea of work to do. He knocked that puppy out and vacuumed it all up in two shakes of a dog's tail. Mom does not want to drive her car for fear of police and being carjacked through the now vacant back window.
That's the setup.
Mom asks me if she can borrow my car to go to the library. I'm ok with this. Most people wouldn't be with my mom's record. She has a tendency to hit parked cars and root around in her purse while turning. I cough up the keys and go back to procrastinating writing my paper (I've had a week to get started...whoops!).
About ten minutes later I'm farting around on the computer and I get a cellphone call. This time it's Patrick. Mom can't get my car started. DID SHE BREAK IT ALREADY!?!?!? I'm about to grab Matt's keys and go find her, but she's still in THE DRIVEWAY! She never figured out how to start my car!
She was using the wrong key! This explains where my brains or lack thereof come from!
After a belly-aching laugh, I return to my previously scheduled procrastinating only to get ANOTHER surprise! Five minutes later, Patrick comes downstairs and gives me my keys back.
"Mom can't figure out how to put your car in reverse, so we're just going to take Matt's."
My mom is funny as hell. You wish you had a mom as cool as mine. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[May. 1st, 2006|04:00 pm] |
A great, big HAPPY BIRTHDAY went out to my friend Cammy this past weekend. A motley crew of highly entertaining individuals was gathered for a celebration at the Maccaroni Grill. Here are a few of the highlights and a few of the dweebs people:
The one with the nice smile on your left is Cammy. She's the birthday girl. Happy 20th! The crazy asian sensation on the right (who is about to eat Cammy like a birthday cake) is Erwen. Erwen is Cammy's boy-toy. You could also say, "He's her bitch." However, he was nice enough to plan out a birthday event.
("Plan out" may indicate a little more order than describes the party, though. Paul and I were the only two people to get to the restaurant on time! )
Whoops! Almost forgot Phil. He's the buff dude half-in the picture and half-out of his mind. Well, not really, but it does make for a wittier comment. He's an ex-Pohickian like yours truly and Cammy.
I got to sit next to these two cool kids. The facial-haired fellow on my left is Paul. He's intensely fond of raccoons, makes odd chirping noises, is a fruitcake personified, and I owe him a peppermint in the face (sneaky bastard got me good in the parking lot as we left). The looker on the right who is trying to stab me with a crayon is Stephanie. I chose "looker" as my description of her, because it is accurate and rhymes with smelly pirate hooker. We had a makeshift drawing contest on the table. I claim victory. (It's my LJ, I can claim whatever I want!)
Here's a sample of the drawings. None of this was drawn by your's truly. It was drawn by Dave and Cammy tagged the fish as me on Facebook. That stinker! Hahahahaha. Like I said, "highly entertaining people"!!!! There were some good illustrations all around. I drew a wicked cool frog, Steph drew a unicorn that she's pregnant with, Whitney did portraits, and Paul drew many man tools. "Man tool" is another word for "penis".
This is Whittless and her boy-toy Dave. You may not be able to see the camera-shy crouton hiding behind Whitney's massive guns, but he's the table artist from above. I jokingly called him a liberal hippy, but I suppose he's more of a libertarian or conservative. Fortunately, there were no politics discussed at this party as politics are the devil. You never win even when you agree with the other person!
Whitney, on the other hand, isn't afraid of no stinking camera. She's planning on being Miss Facial Hair 2007 if the handlebar mustache comes in as planned. Luckily, she has a good sense of humor as well. I know this, or I wouldn't be risking her wrath right now. (To Whit: Please don't hurt me)
Here's a better pic of Dave for those interested. Damn communists.
There were some other, more camera shy peeps at this shindig, but the pictures are lacking in quality. If you really want to see more of the pictures, you'll have to check Facebook. I just wanted to learn how to post pictures and what-not on LJ. I succeeded.
I really wish I had brought my own camera. I could have gotten some fantabulous pictures. As it was, it was a good time. I'll give it 4 stars out of 5. Everyone, but Bill Dan and I went to a movie after dinner. I ended up going up into the district. The driving around in DC for over 2 hours following some ditzy fashion models doing their best to ditch guide my car and another is a separate story for a separate time.
It's all gravy.
EDIT:
Whoops. One last picture.
Can't leave Bill and his blurry-headed brother Dan out. Dan doesn't normally shower, so you're not missing too much by not seeing his face. I've known the two boogers since I was three and it's not normally a party unless at least one of them shows up. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Apr. 27th, 2006|10:37 pm] |
On a random note, I'd just like to say:
Damn, I love my workplace.
Everyone I work with is:
A) Motivated
B) Intelligent
C) Friendly and Fun!
D) Willing to help each other out
Even if I was offered a job paying double my current salary, I'd stick with my job until the end of the year.
I had a grand time riding home from training with 4 of my coworkers today. (All female of course....it's the education field.) I suppose I was in serious danger of estrogen poisoning, but I was laughing too hard to care. Somehow, my coworkers decided our Security Resource Officer needed to have his head photoshopped onto a few pictures and posted around the office. There was much planning being done.
That is all. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Apr. 25th, 2006|10:30 pm] |
I bought myself a microphone and it is most excellent. It is strangely more fun than is allowed in most third world nations. A lot of peeps on my AIM list are smelly pirate hookers and un-fun, but I had several excellent, if one-way, conversations. Erwen even had a mic, so he could talk back.
EDIT: Someone attempted to bot me as well, so I threw it in just for kicks.
Here's the funniest of the conversations I had....you're just going to have to imagine me doing the following:
1) Explaining I'm a cowboy
2) Yelling Yee-ha
3) I sung to a man.
4) I dropped some mad rhymes with my funky fresh skillz.
5) Interrupting conversations of people playing World of Warcraft and digitally mocking them. I may have yelled FunkyButtLoving! at least twice.
( Read more... )
Anyway, I have a microphone. Online video games will never be the same.
My name is Mike McCrory and I'm a Microphone Whore. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Apr. 22nd, 2006|04:41 pm] |
|
Oh yes....I fully intend to steal Whitney's brilliant technique and make a photo-story at some point. |
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| [ |
go |
| |
earlier |
] |
| |
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
mikallo's journal